From 'Jumper' to...

In honor of the movie Jumper, starring Hayden Christensen and Rachel Bilson, this edition of the Canadian Sports Junkie bounces around from subject to subject.

I haven't actually seen Jumper, but I have seen the extended trailer and it felt like I saw the entire film. I figure this column will flow much like I imagine the movie did. For those of you unfamiliar with the premise, here's how IMDB describes it:

"A genetic anomaly allows a young man to teleport himself anywhere. He discovers this gift has existed for centuries and finds himself in a war that has been raging for thousands of years between "Jumpers" and those who have sworn to kill them."

Ok, so after reading that maybe this isn’t an exact replica of the formula, but I’m prepared to give it a try...

You see, originally this was going to be a column about 'What Sam Mitchell Could Do Next', a tongue-in-cheek piece suggesting the Raptors coach was about to be fired and therefore should be touching up his resume and thinking about all the new things he could fill his time with. But then Bryan Colangelo went out and fired the guy before I could post the article.

These were a few of the ideas:
1) Make mix-tapes for Kevin Garnett.
2) Learn how to correctly draw-up an inbound pass play.

3) Count his money: Mitchell is owed the remainder of his $3 million salary this year, a full $3M for next year, plus a buyout of the final year. Anyone still wondering why Jay Triano got the 'interim' gig and will reportedly hold it until the summer? (Hint: He's already on the payroll.)

As a Raptors fan, I'm happy with the move. Sam improved the team during his four-and-a-half-year tenure and did a solid job overall, but last year's playoff defeat and this year's plateauing efforts meant it was time for a change.

With that article's shelf life over before it ever began, I immediately turned to the biggest most monumental story currently happening in Canada: Sean Avery confirming for the umpteenth time that he is a total jerk. This is somehow 100 times more newsworthy than our government being in total chaos and perfectly illustrates why only 59% of registered voters in this country turned out six weeks ago.

But I’m the Canadian Sports Junkie, not the Canadian Politics Junkie, so, back to Avery. I'm not condoning what he said by any means (indeed, it was in poor taste), but the media reaction along with the NHL handed-down suspension of six games are both way over the top. By Thursday night I was so sick of “Sloppy-Gate” that I couldn’t bring myself to fully contribute to the frenzy, and decided to shift gears again.

I thought about my beloved Blue Jays and free agent starting pitcher A.J. Burnett, who left $24 million on the table when he opted out of his Toronto contract and will likely gain an extra $50 million on top of that in his next contract. I was ready to say good riddance and make claims that the sucker-of-a-team who signed Burnett would be grossly over-paying for a guy who has averaged less than 10 wins a year and generally seems more amped about delivering a possible shaving cream pie to someone's face than getting a key out in a tough situation. But right now, at the beginning of December, with more than four months until opening day and a full 11 months until the playoffs, it makes my heart hurt to think about a team that is destined to finish fourth (at best).

So I moved on to the Buffalo Bills/Miami Dolphins game to be played this Sunday in Toronto at Rogers Center. I was going to trumpet the first-ever regular season NFL game to be played in Canada and ruminate about how the franchise will probably end up in the T-Dot at some point, but mostly I just wanted to work in that I would be in attendance. (Check.)

Then I convinced myself I could tie all these ideas together and that was how the bridge was built to the Jumper introduction. And now I realize it was a stretch to work in ‘Jumper’ when I actually wrote an article about writing an article.

I should have just made the ‘Adaptation’ connection.

What We Know So Far...

If TSN hockey analyst Pierre McGuire was asked to describe Chris Bosh, I’m pretty sure we all know what his answer would be: McGuire would take a deep breath, scrunch up his face, and then fire through 50 words in 10 seconds before finishing with “he’s a monster”.

Through 14 games Bosh is second in the league in scoring, averaging 27.6 a game (only 0.3 points behind Lebron James) and is fifth in the league in rebounds with more than 10 per game. In his 40, 42 and 39 point performances over the last 10 days, he took just 19, 27, and 20 shots, remarkably efficient numbers that have pushed Bosh past the All-Star level and into a whole new realm. He’s finishing everything around the basket, getting all the calls, and has single-handedly carried the Raptors to a 7-7 record.

If Sam Mitchell doesn’t run him into the ground first, Bosh will be a MVP candidate. (Is he going to win? No, of course not. Lebron and Kobe are head and shoulders above everyone else. Dwayne Wade would be close but his injury history keeps him off the very short list of the true elite. Chris Paul is gaining, but still too inexperienced.) The problem is, right now Bosh trails only Stephen Jackson when it comes to minutes played, and he’s the only big man amongst the top eight. Bosh hasn’t played less than 38 minutes in a game this year, and he’s coming off a summer where he didn’t have a break. Including the Olympics, Bosh is entering month 15 of what must feel to his body like a 19 (hopefully 20?) month season.

If Sam (or fingers crossed, Sam’s replacement) doesn’t start curtailing Bosh’s minutes, he’ll be out of gas by February. At the latest.

As for the rest of the team, well, here’s what we officially know about the Raptors one fifth of the way through the season:

• Bosh’s beautiful jumper seduces the rest of our team. He has great range, can shoot it from anywhere, and deservedly has carte blanche when it comes to shot selection. If he has the ball in his hands, he can do whatever he wants. He’s earned it. Problem is that everyone else watches Bosh continually knock down shots and then believe they can do the same. Which they can’t. We have Kapono, Parker and Bargnani who all shoot pretty well and a host of others who are adequate at times. But they all need the ball in certain places and shouldn’t be allowed to shoot it from anywhere else.

• Jose Calderon’s hamstring injury is lingering. Calderon was never going to make an All-defensive team, but he made up for it offensively by turning the corner and getting a few easy lay-ins every night. Yes, teams are trying to take that away from him, but Jose is smart enough to capitalize on the tiniest opportunity and because of the hamstring, he can’t.

• We genuinely like each other. Guys get excited when someone else makes a big play, rush over to help a fallen teammate up, and communicate positively while on the court. Even Hasan Adams looks like he legitimately cares. This matters.

• Will Solomon has a little too much Mike James in him…and Roko Ukic doesn’t have enough.

• Kris Humphries should be a regular part of the rotation, even when Jermaine O’Neal is fully healthy (notice I used ‘when’ instead of ‘if’. This is me being optimistic. Strange, isn’t it?). The best starting five for the Raps includes three big men (Bosh, O’Neal, and Bargnani) with Calderon and Anthony Parker. That should mean 12-20 minutes a night for Hump, spotting any of the three a break or protecting someone who could be in foul trouble.

• Jamario Moon is pulling a reverse contract year. Instead of doing all the little things while working his butt off in an attempt to secure a multi-million dollar free agent contract, he looks like he’s trying to play himself out of the league.

• We won’t have to worry about a new Kanye song during pre-game introductions, because 808s & Heartbreak is mostly garbage. Let's put it this way: I know of only two people left in this world who continue to buy CD's rather than download them for free, and I'll use this space to tell them both not to waste their money.

• The Raps will inevitably come up short in any coaching battle. The only adjustment Sam Mitchell has made this year is back to glasses. During the current 4-7 streak that followed the 3-0 start, Toronto has blown 10+ point leads four different times and have gone on to lose three of those games. Sam is a decent motivator but as a tactician he’s awful. Lawrence Frank, Doc Rivers and Stan Van Jeremy have all mopped the floor with him, a list that will undoubtedly expand as the team heads West.