The New Tiger Order

Way back in 1996 Hulk Hogan, who had left the WWE (then the WWF) and moved over to WCW a few years earlier, shocked the wrestling world and traumatized millions of adolescent boys when he turned heel and started a new group of wrestling bad boys that he called the 'New World Order'.

Up until that point Hogan had been the biggest baby-face in wrestling history. He built a huge following of loyal fans on the basis of his wholesome American image, but put that all in the rearview mirror when he lashed out at those fans and wrestling itself for underappreciating his talent.

He even changed his nickname, scrapping the iconic Hulk Hogan to go with a new name that fit his new image and persona better: Hollywood Hogan. The yellow trunks and Hulkamania tank-top were out and a new look that was highlighted by a dark shadow beard grown in around his trademark moustache was in.

At first his fans were appalled, but after the initial shock wore off something strange happened: bad became cool.

You might be asking yourself, what does wrestling have to do with a sports blog? Is the CSJ drunk? Or does he have a secret wrestling fetish we've never heard about?

The answers: everything, no, and not anymore.

You see, there is a certain world famous golfer who could easily take a page out of the Hogan handbook.

The carefully cultivated public image that Tiger Woods spent his entire life building was all wiped away the instant he slammed his SUV into a fire hydrant only metres from his own house last November. The stories of infidelity and the relentless media mocking, along with his robotic and creepy press conference in March, and the current rumours speculating that his wife is ready to file for divorce have left Tiger with a lower Q rating than anyone ever imagined possible for him.

The result is that Tiger, the biggest baby-face in golf for a decade and-a-half, has now been cast as a villain. He's already turned heel, even if he doesn't want to admit it.

Late last week Tiger announced that his next tournament will be the Quail Hollow Championship that begins on April 29th. I'm not saying he should body-slam Phil Mickelson on the first tee or demand CBS play Christina Aguilera's "Dirty" as his intro music, but why not see how the other side lives? He's been the PGA Tour's good guy for more than 15 years, if he now has to be the bad guy, why not do it on his terms?

Keep the dark shades. Lose the razor. Give us even more fist-pumps. Win tournaments by 20 shots. Date Kate Hudson. Tell the world you made a mistake, that you weren't ready to get married. And then hit every hotspot in Los Angeles, Las Vegas and New York. Maybe even convince Sergio Garcia (playing the role of Kevin Nash) and Steve Williams (as Scott Hall) to move in with you and star in your own reality show. How does 'Isleworth Shore' sound?

In the end, just as they did for Hogan, the fans will come back to Tiger. Most people cheered for him because he was an epic winner and unbelievably exciting golfer to watch, not because they thought he was a good guy. Once this initial shock wears off, whether it takes months or years, he will win the fans back.

In the meantime, why not have some fun with it?

"Hello World" Again?

We're five weeks into a new golf season that is creating as much buzz as a Wilmer Valderrama film at Sundance.

Ever since Tiger Woods drove his SUV into a fire hydrant 50 feet from his driveway, golf attention and news has shifted from the tee box to the tabloids. In the two and-a-half months since that night, we've heard Tiger was in Sweden, Arizona, Long Island and finally in Mississippi where he was allegedly released from sex rehab last week.

Meanwhile, on the PGA Tour, Ryan Palmer, Bill Haas and Ben Crane were winning golf tournaments. Paint also dried.

Steve Stricker and Geoff Ogilvy, both top ten players, also won tournaments but neither provided the necessary star power to bring the buzz back to the course. Instead, we continue to wonder where Tiger is and when he's coming back? And most importantly, an 'indefinite break' ends before the Masters, right?

The initial reaction to the Tiger story from the golf community was, unsurprisingly, silence. Tiger has always been notoriously private and reportedly aloof with his peers. The deal between them was fairly straight forward: he made them all obscenely rich and they stayed out of his way. Amongst tour players Tiger's private life, at least on the record, was 'Fight Club' and we all know the first rule of 'Fight Club'.

Shortly after the scandal broke Jesper Parnevik criticized Woods but that was expected and understandable, as Jesper employed Tiger's wife Elin as a babysitter and played a role in introducing the couple.

Then in late December Sergio spoke out. And then Geoff Ogilvy did too. Both did the previously unthinkable and actually discussed the personal life of Tiger Woods, with Ogilvy going as far as trying to suggest Tiger owed it to the tour to hold a press conference away from the course before he comes back. (In what must have been rock-bottom for Woods, John Daly even offered some advice.)

The comments from Sergio, Ogilvy and more recently Tom Watson all made me raise an eyebrow. Why would they risk ticking Tiger off? Do they really want him extra motivated when he comes back? Are they trying to see if he can win a tournament by 20 shots?

It just didn't make sense. Tiger is the best. By a mile. If the players encouraged a rapid comeback or goaded him into returning, their earnings would take a monumental hit. Their chances of winning would significantly decrease. Why wouldn't they take advantage of the moment and let a sleeping Tiger lye? Why would they disobey 'The Code'?

All good questions that only lead to one answer: they, like us, are scared Tiger may not be back for a while. And while that may be positive for their personal bank accounts in the short-term, in the long-run, with a new television deal on the horizon and several title-sponsorships in question, it could be disastrous.

It was in 1996 that a 20 year-old Tiger burst onto the scene and announced his arrival with the words "Hello, world". For professional golf to snap out of its current funk, Tiger will need to have a rebirth. Soon.

And so it began...

First and foremost, I'm a fan. OK, maybe I'm a bit of a freak. Alright fine…ahem. My name is the Canadian Sports Junkie and I'm a sports-aholic.

It started with hockey, the Jets in the late 80's.

Dale Hawerchuk, Thomas Steen, Freddy Olausson...those were my guys.

My Dad had a quarter-share of two season tickets at the old Winnipeg Arena and he'd take me to a handful of games each year, but mostly I listened on the radio. Back then the Jets played in the Smythe Division and the late puck-drops inevitably led to me falling asleep before hearing the final score (assuming my Mom hadn't already caught me trying to deke around her bed checks and confiscated my radio). Most of the time I could scan the newspaper in the morning, but if the Jets were on the West coast the box score would read 'late' and I'd be left in the dark until my Dad came home for supper that night. That was a crushing feeling as a nine year-old, and thankfully, because of the internet, a feeling no child will ever know again.

Hockey was my first jones, but it quickly spread from there.

I remember Ben Johnson winning the gold medal at the 1988 Olympics in Seoul, then being stripped of it, and not quite being old enough to understand the proper context.

I remember buying the NHL Yearbook magazines and reading them cover-to-cover several times over, treating each edition like a newborn baby, preserving it in mint condition, year after year. I wasn't in a rush to do my homework, but I could tell you who the Sharks were most likely to select first in the expansion draft.

In the early '90s Henry "Gizmo" Williams initiated my interest in the CFL with his back-flip celebrations, but it was Matt Dunigan throwing for 700+ yards in a Blue Bomber uniform that won me over.

Then the Jays won back-to-back World Series and the Expos won in '94 (yes they did) and suddenly I had another itch to scratch. I know a lot of people complain that baseball is boring and the season is too long, but they're not taking into consideration how fun it is to hate the Yankees and Red Sox. Or how truly rewarding it would be to actually beat them again.

And then, after Michael Jordan and the Chicago Bulls caught my attention, the Raps and the Grizz joined the NBA and another love affair developed. Sure, those first few years of the NBA in Canada had the sizzle of a $2 steak, but hey, at least we had the Naismith Cup!

From there March Madness and soccer's World Cup were added to my roster, the WWE was dropped, and golf, tennis, and perhaps the grand-daddy of them all, the NFL, were brought onboard.

Why is it that every show on television is copycatted, but none of the other pro sports leagues will try to emulate the NFL? Short, meaningful regular seasons, concrete schedule, and do-or-die playoffs. I mean, could you imagine if the NHL played exclusively on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays? You don't think this would help attract US television audiences? A regimented schedule that you can plan for...what a concept!

Now? I'm a sick puppy.

European Tour golf early on the weekends? Check.

College football on a Saturday afternoon? Most definitely.

The Champions League on a Tuesday or Wednesday? Pour me a Guiness and count me in.

I might not wake up in time to watch Lewis Hamilton and Fernando Alonso start the race, but I'll be there to catch the checkered flag.

No one will contact me on weekdays between 5:30 and 6PM EST because they know I won't answer them. That's PTI time, or as it's known in my house...church.

I live for stats, I can pore over box scores and league leaders for hours, but I also know how much they do and do not mean.

I love Christmas, but I might love the World Junior Hockey Championships even more. I appreciate Easter weekend, but Good Friday will (almost) always be Day 2 of the Masters to me.

In short, I love sports. I enjoy playing them and love watching and dissecting the games and contests. I love agreeing and disagreeing with the announcers, watching replays to see which players genuinely care, and busting my buddies chops when their teams lose, especially if it's at the hands of one of my own teams.

I know I shouldn't care nearly as much as I do, but I can't help myself. The competition, the intensity, the dim-witted GM's who constantly make bad decisions, it's all food for my insatiable appetite.

The Ugly Canadian (Open)

It's been a quick and tragic descent toward mediocrity (or worse) for the Canadian Open. The tournament that was once considered the 5th major has become a mere footnote on the PGA Tour.

Whether you blame Tiger (for removing us from his schedule) or the Tour itself (for sticking us with a horrific date directly following the British Open), it's clear our National Championship has lost much of its considerable luster.

With a list of past champions that includes many of the game's biggest names (Walter Hagen, Tommy Armour, Sam Snead, Byron Nelson, Arnold Palmer, Lee Trevino, Greg Norman and Tiger Woods) and as owners of a 104 year-old tournament (3rd longest in golf), how did we (read: the RCGA) let this happen? Ok, that was a lot of brackets, but I needed them.

Instead of the best golfers on the planet competing to be our champion, we now attract a couple of great players, a lot of good ones, and more than a few who should be selling us equipment at Golf Town. When only 6 of the top 50 ranked players in the world show up, it's tough to take an event seriously, especially if it's a national championship. Which is why something, anything, needs to change.

And the Nationwide Tour has already provided the blueprint: attach Wayne Gretzky to the tournament. Make it the RBC Canadian Open hosted by Wayne Gretzky. Invite Canadian celebrities (athletes, actors, entertainers, etc.) to play in a two day pro-am that wraps up Friday and leaves the weekend to the pros.

That preserves the integrity of our national championship and hopefully calms the traditionalists, but also gives the event a much needed facelift. It could be a celebration of Canadian talent and achievement (as long as Pamela Anderson isn't involved), two days to honour our own and raise the tournament's profile.

Some might argue that with two celebrity pro-am tournaments already on Tour, there isn't any need for a third. However, both the Bob Hope and Pebble Beach are amongst the first events of the season, so staging another more than five months later shouldn't be an issue.

Imagine the media attention people like Sydney Crosby, Steve Nash, Ryan Gosling, Jack Bauer and a host of others would command? Couldn't it be sold to the players as a nice change of pace after a major championship week? Or as a chance to meet some of our country's most recognizable faces? Surely it would provide more entertainment value and publicity than four days of grinding golf by players most people have never heard of.

The last time the Canadian Open generated any real buzz was four long years ago when Mike Weir snatched defeat from the jaws of victory and handed Vijay Singh the trophy. Since then the event has been met with less and less enthusiasm, and yet organizers continue to do nothing to change the trend.

If the top players aren't going to show up regardless of what we do, we're pretty much reduced to one single storyline: can a Canadian win or contend? It's like Groundhog Day.

In that case, I say we go all the way and make Bill Murray a part of it.